Wednesday, February 24, 2010

A Vignette of Motherhood

Tuesday was Book Club day.  I love Book Club day.  So much so that Book Club day will always have capital letters when I think about it.  Sometimes we have great discussions on the book sometimes we don't even bother to discuss the book. (What were we reading?  Did anyone finish it?) As usual, I was home well past my bedtime and finally got to sleep around midnight. 

(Extra spaces for Malissa...)

Elise, normally a good sleeper, woke me up at 2:30 a.m. (Teething)  And again at 4.  (Also, teething but possibly some sheer perversity.)  At that point, I knew I was toast.  Did I mention that Jared has a HUGE presentation at work today? Like earth-shatteringly HUGE. Normally Jared is good to get up with Elise at night if she needs it because he can get back to sleep.  I cannot.  I'm a naptard too.  I also have to have at least 8 hours of sleep to be good.  5 to be functional.  So you see where my day is headed. 

We managed to make it through speech therapy with almost flying colors.  Elise was a bit surly but not openly hostile.  We even managed to squeeze in some service for a lady living down the road.  And then...

My friend Liz from Rochester calls.  Liz just had a baby and is going to be in town this weekend with her husband.  I'm super excited to see her and we're catching up when I see it...

Bright pink nail polish all over the carpet!  We rent! We have nice carpet!  Crap! The bottle is empty.  This. Is. Not. Good.

Off the phone with Liz, running to the kitchen. Crap, crap, crap!...Elise runs after me "Cwap! Cwap!" I quickly and silently thank my brain filter for catching the other word that wanted to escape. 

I run to my computer and hastily type "nail polish carpet".  Hooray for other people with nail polish, carpet, and pets/toddlers! So we're cleaning the carpet with several remedies and I smell the smell coming from Elise.  You know what I'm talking about.  I think ok I can leave the stuff on the carpet and be back in a flash.

Into the poo cave (a.k.a. laundry room) to change Elise's diaper.  We're flying along, I stand her up to pull up her pants...and...she barfs on us.  SERIOUSLY???  Arrrgh! (Elise "Rawr!"  Woohooo! mommy's making bear noises!)  I hate teething.  I hate nail polish and I loathe being barfed on.  I have no issues with poo, pee, or mucus but I hate throw up.  Yes, I understand that it's part of the job.  So are toilets, they're not my fave either.

Off to the bedrooms, Elise gets a new outfit, mom gets a new outfit, out we go to the living room and I see that everything has dried.  It's crusty but most of the nail polish is gone.  As is most of the paint on the baseboard.  Oops.